Why you Need to Raise your Expectations

I recently had someone message me about the topic of expectations. He posed a great question about his mixed feelings regarding those who write that in order to be happy, you must lower your expectations.

I loved his message to me, because I’ve written about this topic before and I also touch upon it in my book From Aspiration to Fulfillment.

I personally have a strong take on this. For me, you should never lower your expectations! You should believe and expect to have your dreams and goals come true.

Do not lower your standards and expectations, thinking that if you do then at least you save yourself some level of sadness, resentment and disappointment if your expectations do not transpire.

For me, it is in lowering my expectations that leads to disappointment. When you don’t expect your dreams to manifest, you’re telling your subconscious mind that you do not have that which you want. You’re also telling it that your goal will not happen.

Consequently, you will continue to not have what you want, even though you deeply desire it. This leads to even greater dissatisfaction, because you end up lying to yourself.

Your beliefs determine your results.

How can you believe you can have or be something, yet not expect it to happen? 

Here’s the thing, you get what you prepare and expect to have. It’s that simple. If you want to achieve something, yet don’t believe it can happen; then you’re missing a big part of the manifestation process. You have to believe that you can have it and prepare to receive it, by taking action towards it. This is how you make it feel welcomed and allow it to show up.

Now the thing that also gets people tripped up when trying to manifest something is that they get attached to how it will show up for them, which yes can lead to disappointment.

For example, you dream of a loving relationship, yet the one that shows up does not match what you expected him or her to be or look like. You want more money, yet you’re attached to the specific channel that it comes from, when the truth is money comes from unlimited channels. These are the ways that expectations limit you, but it’s because you’re expectations is fixated on the how vs. the what.

You can live a happy life and be grateful for what you have, while reaching and expecting your dreams to manifest. Expect that the what will show up, whether it’s a loving relationship, more money, health etc., while at the same time releasing the expectations on how, the form, and the channel by which it must show up for you.

At one point in my life, I was craving a loving relationship with a man who would love me completely. Someone who was ready to commit wholeheartedly to me. I then resolved that it would happen and knew inside my heart that I was ready and I expected to meet him soon!

The form showed up as a crazy, white, French Canadian man dancing by himself at bar, asking me to dance. I allowed myself and focused on what it was that I wanted; a loving and committed relationship.

Four years later he became my husband and father of my kids!

We really do get to have and be what we believe, expect and prepare to have.