I write a lot about being in an empowered state and how we should maintain positive thoughts and beliefs because it creates the world that we see. I believe in this 100%, but I also believe in honouring the feelings that come up for us when dealing with circumstances around us.
I think at times we tend to numb our feelings, and get down on ourselves for feeling angry or upset. It is important for us to find space and a place to out our emotions. Sometimes, we hold it in because others may judge us, and we add to it by judging ourselves for feeling the emotion in the first place.
This is something that I experienced last week and was able to feel at peace simply by expressing my emotions.
There were events that happened last week, that I felt my ego taking control of my emotions. It was a week that started with the shock, sadness and disappointment when I learnt of the verdict of the Trayvon Martin case, actor Cory Monteith's death, and then the outpour of negative remarks about a Cheerio's commercial that featured an interracial family.
The comments were so bad that they had to disable the comment section on the YouTube video (check out kids' response in the video section this week! It is truly amazing and reminds me just how much we could all learn from children).
I felt angry at the lack of justice from the case; angry at a Facebook post commenting that Cory's death being stupid and not sad. I could not understand how this person did not see the sadness of a person losing their life because of an addiction.
I then got angry at the Cheerio's commercial because I could not believe that we being in 2013 can still have so much hatred over race. I also took it personal as someone who is in an interracial marriage myself, with a beautiful and amazing son, how dare someone attack our choices?
Many times when I find myself in a place of anger and sadness, I tend to beat myself up for it. I would tell myself that I should know better! However, during this past week, I watched an episode of one of my summer guilty pleasures Big Brother, where 2 houseguests were making racial remarks.
At that moment all the rush of the week's triggers came up and I just felt my anger explode. I ranted to my husband about the disgust I felt about what I was seeing. I let my ego take the reign and just let it all out - without any censor!
After my rant, I took a deep breath, and felt the craziest thing! A wave of calm and peacefulness came over my body. It felt like the calmness that I get after a really good cry. I actually turned to my husband and said something like; "Wow! I feel much better now.
More at peace and calm." I knew then that I was holding in all these emotions all week and it was boiling up ready to spill.
This feeling that I experienced reinforced for me the importance of "honouring our feelings". We get so down on ourselves for feeling angry and upset, then go into self-judgement about our feelings. However, we must remember that we are human and part of that includes feeling all the emotions that come up for us. We do not need to hide it or pretend that we are okay.
The relief I felt after my vent allowed me to release the toxic feeling from my body and out my ego and anger to someone who cared and listened to me without judgement nor without adding to it.
I urge you to find someone and some way peaceful to release the angry that you may be experiencing. Speak to someone, write it out, journal it, do something!
But, please do not keep the anger within as it will sit there and eventually express itself and usually at someone or something that did not deserve it. Being angry and disappointment is okay. As long as we express it in a way that does not hurt others.
So the next time you feel your ego taking control of your emotions, do not beat yourself up for it.
Call and speak to someone who supports you and vent your frustrations to him or her. Out your feelings and then choose to see the lesson you were meant to learn, forgive yourself and release the anger.
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